so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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