This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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