she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
