To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
