Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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