loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize
