god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
