Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Randomize
