i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
