Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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