Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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