Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
