After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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