Me too!
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
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