Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i don't like sucking hair
True but thats because hes a fetus.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
