We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize