I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize
