We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
