my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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