operation have a gay friend backfired
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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