Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Randomize
