Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
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