that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
