You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
You need a sexual gate keeper
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
