i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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