Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
