Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
