O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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