i think my tv is drunk
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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