After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
