She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
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