Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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