It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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