Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Randomize