I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
