u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
