i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
