i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
