Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
