what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
