will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
