David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Randomize
