let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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