I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Someone came in the potted fern
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize
