the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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