DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
