got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
