Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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