I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
