Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize