I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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