Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
